Th3 Balancing Act

Drinking tea and staring at my braced-and-propped-up foot.  My sense of balance has always been off - of course I would jump down and *crack!* sprain my ankle.  It's not like I couldn't tell that my balance was going.; whenever I get tired or have a good, intense workout my inner ear takes a vacation.  But still, I was being ambitious and ignored the warning signs.

This seems to be a reoccurring problem in my life - not just being physically unbalanced, but mentally and emotionally off-kilter as well.  I seem to be going good, balancing work, school, friends, family and POI(s)*, when I (metaphorically) fall on my butt.  I HATE that.  It's just when I think that I can almost make my life work, something goes wrong and I lose someone/thing because of it. 

Maybe that's normal.  I dunno.  I just really want to be independent and alone and good at what I do.  I don't need to be perfect, just at least competent at the things I do.  No flaking, no failing, no forgetting.  This just in: yeah, that's not happening.  But facing, acknowledging that I can't do it all is hard.  Like really hard.  Like things-that-dent-concrete hard.

No wonder people bury themselves in sex, in alcohol, in friends, in relationships, in anything that they possibly can.  Reality sucks otherwise.

*POI - Person Of Interest, usually of a romantic nature